my friend just texted me “figured out how to wear my coat as a skirt and leggings!” with this picture o h my god
she calls it a skoat im cr ying
everyone says “just get out and leave everything behind in the event of a house fire” like no fuck that shit im grabbing every electronic i can hold
the original pokemon were so cool. plant with feet. pile of eggs. slime that turns into bigger slime. other plant with feet
Don’t forget rat. And bigger rat.
sphere. bigger sphere. one magnet. three magnets. another slime.
goldfish.
for some reason i thought both of these were the same post and i sat for awhile trying to figure out which ice cream face was the weak bitch
scooby
i get so nervous when my friends comfortably swear around their parents like wtf dude…you just said a bad word…
I comfortably swear around my mom lol
WHAT THE…*looks aroubd cautiously* HECK IS WRONG WITH YOU
if everybody got a free miniature animal at birth that protected you, like a tiny elephant or dragon, the world would be a better place.
There’d be dragons everywhere. Dragons have to eat. We’d all be dead.
we’d arrange sacrifices of humans
starting with you
I honestly just remembered this story but my neighbour runs a hotel with a library where they have a “take a book, leave a book” policy and one day he went into the library to find that the shelves had been completely cleared out, nothing was left except for one little thing.
What was left behind, you ask?
A single copy of The Book Thief.
Ellen: Do you know the sex of the child?
Tina: We decided we are going to wait. We’re going to find out…never.
Ellen: Ok.
Tina: Not even after it’s born.
Ellen: Not even after it’s born?
Tina: I’m just going to see what it chooses to wear to prom.
Ellen: Give it time to figure it out. Good for you.
All the awards.
